Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Investigator from the Grand Canyon

Hi Mom,
(I told Nikko that in church sacrament prayer had to be repeated and was reminding him when that happened to him) I remember doing the sacrament prayer and messing up. It's okay though we learn from our mistakes and the prayer really does need to be perfect it's such an important thing that I had to realize on my mission and it is such a blessing. Yeah President Thomson is a great guy, I feel really blessed to have had him as my stake president he is the reason I was able to get out here when I did and it's all because he had faith in me and saw something in me I didnt and still don't see, but he is someone I'm really grateful for.
Yeah Elder Kim told me how cold it was! (His first mission companion came to meet before going home to Korea) It's starting to get "California Cold" here haha. Which is nothing compared to Utah cold. But never the less it's pretty stinkin chilly! I hate wearing my suits because I don't want to pay to get them dry cleaned and it's been raining a ton lately! So I'm super excited to get the package you sent with my sweater :) Anyways Elder Kim is awesome huh? I know you showed him some baby pictures I hear...haha i knew it would happen. He did tell me that he was so very happy to meet you and really appreciated that you took the time to be able to talk with him. He's someone I'm very glad I got the chance to get really close with,  Elder Kim  is someone who will be a friend for life And I feel very grateful for his example and constant patience with me learning Korean and adjusting to mission life. I really hope to go to Korean someday and spend time with him and his family and hopefully I'll be able to actually talk and have a sincere conversation with his parents by then because they don't know a lick of English haha.
So when Elder Kim was with his parents he went on this tour around California and to the grand canyon and such and there was this Korean Lady, Tina Kim who I guess heard Elder Kim speak English at one of the spots to a white person and saw his area code somehow and was really impressed with his english and asked if he could pay him to teach her english. And he told her he was going to Korea but he there's other people like him who can do that for free and he gave us her contact info. We contacted her and met her the next day (This all happened this week) and found out she has never even heard of our church and was shocked when she looked us up and saw how many church buildings we have. And she found out she lives next to one of the local wards in Hacendia, but didnt realize it was church since there was no cross haha. But we met her Thursday at a costco and taught her some basic english (She knows barely any english) and shared a scripture in 2nd Nephi about how God has an everlasting love for her. And she told us how shes has had all these trials all of the sudden and has been praying for help and she believes we are the answer and she said that meeting us was so weird how it happened but a dream come true. She calls us her Angels from heaven. We continued to meet her Friday, Saturday and she came to church this Sunday! MY companion let me lead the lessons and I've been getting really frustrated lately with Korean and getting really down on myself about how I felt I wasn't progressing anymore, like it felt I just hit this brick wall that came out of nowhere. But when we teach her English she really knows like NO english haha She can say Coorlrlr and Dank You. haha. And it forced me to define English words in Korean and I realized how much more Iknow than I thought and when we teach lessons its normally in english haha but her we have to use Korean which is SO awesome and it forces us to make our lessons really simple. She came to church and we met after and shared the video The light of Christ mormon message ( watch it! compares how the light of Christ is always there so there is never darkness but is sometimes dim so that we only have enough light to be guided by faith and makes us search for anwers so that we can cherish those answers and they become our testimony that we hold dear to our hearts)  because she has a really hard time feeling god's love so praying is difficult for her. We shared the scriptures 1kings 19:11-12 and then shared 3rd Nephi11:10-12 and She asked me how I came to recognize the light of Christ (This is at carls JR. btw.) Myself nor my companion really knew exactly what to say to be able so she could understand and we kinda rambled for a second and I said a quick prayer in my heart to know what to say so that I could help her recognize and feel his love her like he's done with me. And right there I had a prompting to share 1 Nephi 1:20 and it talks about how God gives his tender mercies to his blessed people because they strengthen us. Me and my companion testified of the truth of this and then she kinda shocked me by asking me to tell her a real personal experience of how I know this is true and not just the traditional I know this is true because of the Holy Ghost she wanted a life experience. Immediately I thought of you and my dad. I began to tell her my parents got divorced when I was at a young age and that we moved from Texas to Utah to be with the family on my moms side. I told her that when a was little I didnt understand what divorce really was and that when I was little due to ignorance, I was mad and frustrated  that my dad wasn't around and I would be mad at my mom because at first I thought it was my mom's fault for why I didn't see my dad. As a boy growing up I was always angry. I didn't have a dad to do guy things with. I further said how not having a father in my life I started to rebel at a young age and thought I could do what I wanted. I told her how as I got older I became more rebellious and started to get in a lot of trouble and just did bad things and became a lot more disrespectful towards my family and mother, and that my mom used to stay up crying due to my actions and then I still somehow always blame her. I told her about how there was from the age 15-18ish where I thought there was no God. I truly didn't believe because why would he do this to me or even to my mom? Why would my dad leave his family like that? Then I told her how for some reason my heart was softened and I truly saw how much my mom did. How she worked TWO jobs to support me and her and to give me everything she could. How she worked two jobs to buy me things I didn't need because she was always sorry for not raising me with brothers or sisters and a dad. Even though it wasn't her fault. I told her how she continually would cry and cry again because of my actions and would do nothing but show me everlasting love when I would give nothing but a headache in return. I told her when I fell away from the church she never got mad at me or never showed less love she gave me my free agency and instead of forcing me to go to church like some parents did, she continued to do what was right. I told Tina it wasn't easy for my mom she had a hard life growing up she had nothing when she moved to Utah she worked countless hours to put a roof over my head in a nice nieghboorhood with food in our fridge. She patiently went through all her trials with just the hope that something better was on the other side. She went through financial struggles trying her hardest to not let me know of them, she went through physical trials as well as her many emotional ones, and how my mom had to have surgeries for reasons I didn't understand. And I expressed how she did this all while raising an ungrateful child. Once I came to realize these things and when it hit me how i felt so bad, and how I could never make up for doing the things I do. But I expressed how you were the light of Christ for me and my life. I was never in the darkness that I thought I was in. I was never abandoned by God like I thought. He just showed me the light through a different source. Although for a few years my life may have been surrounded in darkness it was never the complete darkness I thought it was. I realized God had always given me sufficient light to guide me to my next step but he didn't just make everything bright and didn't revil all these things to me at once because he knew what I needed to get a testimony of him being there and he knew what it was going to take for me to not only obtain that testimony but to hold onto it as well. I think he knew how prideful of a person I was and knew I would have forever been carried away in my own pride if he wouldn't have given me the trials he did at a young age. God knew I could get a testimony of him but I think he knew I would have never cherished it like I do now if he didn't make it so I would see just how bad and how dark life can be without us letting him be apart of everyday life. I concluded by saying at the age 4 and even at 16 and 17ish i would have never guessed that having a loser dad would be a true blessing in disguise. And that God may not take away our trials but instead give us the strength we need to endure them or the patience that we need to get through them. And I told her how I'm living proof that God doesn't take away our trials because he knows what we need to become perfect like him. After all this was said and after she finally stopped crying she said "I want to be able to see life from a different view and feel God's love for me like you have and I want to have the patience and faith your mom has"
After she said this and after my companion translated that for me I couldn't help but begin to cry a little bit (JUST a little bit) And then me and Elder Ham begin to tell her how she can and how it all starts with sincere prayer. And we plan on meeting her again wednesday.
No matter what happens with Tina Kim whether she gets baptized or moves to Vegas and I never hear from her again. I will always be grateful for meeting her because of the testimony I have gotten from sharing those things with her. I think you're a way better example of living proof of how God visits people in their afflictions and helps them get through their trials.  And I know the only reason I cherish it so much is because of the things I have gone through. I know that you are aware of the fact I made a lot of stupid choices but I don't know if you know how many stupid choices I did make and  just how "dark" my life was becoming. I think it was close to the point where if I would have made just a few more dumb things, my life would have been permanently effected. 
It's taken me until my 3rd transfer to really see how awesome the Book Of Mormon is but holy cow this is the coolest book ever! Elder Ham got really bad food poisoning tuesday and we had to cancel all our appointments that day because he couldn't take two steps without throwing up. I originally was just going to sleep all day and maybe watch some of the LDS movies we have from the mission office, instead I decided to read from the Book of Mormon. I was in like Alma 17ish and to be honest I only decided to read because the day before in personal study it was starting to get to the wars and I was super interested and suprised there was wars in the Book of Mormon...in Detail! haha. So I sat down and read all day and read close to 200 pages and in 3rd Nephi 27 and am almost finished! I have gained such a strong testimony of the Book of Mormon and have all the sudden just been reading it at such a faster pace and actually understanding it all! Which to me is SO crazy because I hate reading. And if there was one thing I hated more than reading was "fancy talk" old english. I remember before my mission I tried to read it a little bit and it was going through my eyes and out my nose! And the other day I read my patriachal blessing and it says how I'll enjoy reading good books and will be able to read them quickly while understanding them fully. And it was crazy to just see that once I had a stronger faith in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and sincerely praying for desire to read this book and to be able to understand it, how I went from reading one chapter a day during my 1 hour of personal study time and trying so hard to understand what it meant and make sense of everything, to reading around 10-13 Chapters in an hour and being to be able to fully understand it and better yet Remember it so I can share it with people I meet when I need to.

Sorry this is so long haha this was just a week of a lot of great personal revelation that I wanted to share with you. The investigator with the Bapt. date that me and Elder Ham fell through on us and we haven't met him a couple weeks so please keep in your prayers. We're supposed to meet him this week so we will see. Also tell Derek I was market contacting and started talking to this guy and found out he is a member and actually he served in Korea (I was orignally confused why this white guy was at a korean market haha) and also he served with Derek! I can't remember his name I wrote it down but left it in the apt. I think his name was like scott hutchinson or maybe Richard something...? He was short and chubby and a little odd never the less he did know Derek. But we're going over to his house to eat this week I'm excited. 
Is Colten getting married? Is she cute? if so is she blind? hahah Jk if Colten is a cutie :)
I love you mom!  You were the best mom and dad that any could ever ask for!
Love Elder Meza.

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